07 Feb 2009
When Simon Cowell and Sinitta got together in the 80's, I knew nothing good could come from it.
You see, Sinitta's world-wide smash, So Macho, continues to bring in royalties to this day, and some of those royalties go to this man, George Hargreaves, who believe it or not, co-wrote and produced it.
However, he long ago turned his back on the bright lights of tinny sounding disco pop, and has instead turned his talents to christian funamentalist preaching. And not the good kind. Though so far, that hasn't gone quite as well as the cheesy euro pop. In 2007, he ran for parliment in Glasgow, but even though he accused his Green Party opponent of being a 'gay fundamentalist', he was roundly beaten. His Christian Party won a measly 1.4% of the votes. The big gay won. (Which must make it all the more annoying for George that the B-side of 'So Macho' was called 'Cruising' It was! I swear. Sinitta was all about the gays.)
Aaaaaanygay.... Now George is really pissed off about the atheists putting ads on the busses, suggesting that there 'probably' isn't a God, so people should 'stop worrying and enjoy' their lives. Yep, George is really annoyed about it, because he is absolutely sure there is a God, and when He's not too busy smiting gays, and smoting people for eating shell fish (God is against shell fish. He is. It says so in Leviticus. It does! I swear. Stop questioning me! I only speak the truth. OK, if you don't believe me, Google it yourself. Or better still, read Leviticus. Then come back and apologise for doubting me. Well go on. I don't have all bloody day! And while you're at it, check out what God has to say about people who wear poly-cotton blends. He's a funny guy is God. Hilarious.) he's really annoyed about the atheists and their bus campaign. (Did you just have to go back and remind yourself how that sentence started? You did, didn't you? It's ok. So did I.)
So George has gone back to his bank to get some more of his 'So Macho' royalties to put his own ads on the busses. His ads are brilliant. They very cleverly mimic the atheist ads. They say, "There definitely is a God. So join the Christian Party and enjoy your life". Isn't that brilliant? I'm sold!
Back in 2007, he was asked about all the money he still gets from the gay-lovin' Siniit's hit, and he defended it. "It says in the Bible that so long as Earth remains there shall be seed time and harvest. You could say that So Macho was the seed I sowed and now I'm reaping the harvest", he said, apparently without sniggering. "That money allows me to do the work that needs to be done to advance Christianity."
By the way. Did you know that Sinitta used to go out with Brad Pitt? For two years in the late 80's? She did! I swear! Look. I told you before, I only speak the truth. If you want to read something that's made up, read the bible.
And here's 'So Macho'. Sinitta doesn't like 'boys who think they're a girl'. Harrumph! Well, I always thought Sinitta looked like a trannie, so there!
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